I know, I've been slacking a bit with the updates lately ... I haven't really been myself lately. I haven't been in the best of moods ... I've been a bit down. Well, I don't know if "down" is the proper word for it - maybe just a little stressed/a little on edge.
Normal for me now is to be positive and overall, a happy person. But lately I haven't been as happy and optimistic as usual. The reason being ...
For quite some time now I've been working on a plan - the plan was to get through all the wedding stuff, and then once it was over, start improving my life overall. Well, I've been working on improvements for quite some time now (losing 12kg/26lbs was a pretty good one...) - but the plan was to get started on a proper career path after the wedding. I plan on starting a design company.
Now that the wedding is over, I know it's time to kick the business plan into high gear. And I guess I'm just a bit freaked out by the reality of it all. I know I can do it - I don't have any doubts about that - but there will be a lot of chances that I'll have to take and a lot of uncertainty that I'll have to deal with. So I know my moods lately have been due to the fear of the unknown.
But I know that it has to happen - I just can't work for someone else for much longer. My job isn't really that bad - but it just isn't for me. I work with a bunch of scientists all day ... not the best place for an artistically-inclined person to be! I mean, the people are nice and all - but really, I know that I really just don't belong there. I've really only befriended three people at work - and two of them have now left - so I don't even have much to look forward to (socially) anymore. :(
I figure that you only live once, so you should really do all that you can to make it as good as you can. I don't want to work for someone else, doing a lame job, for the rest of my life. I want a job where I have the flexibility to lead a life that is ideal for me. And I believe that the only way to get a job like that is to make it myself. So that's what I plan on doing. Dan is planning something similar as well, cuz' he thinks like me - he just wants more from life.
I've been emailing with Ben (he was our wedding planner) off and on over the past while. And after having conversed with him a bit more, I'm even more inspired to get my own thing going. He too is a visual artist (painter) so I guess we're sort of on the same page.
So anyways ... I won't bore you with the details of my plan now, as you'll likely hear a lot more about them later. :)